Why Iron Man is my favorite superhero.

The simple answer would be that I am a geek. More specifically a Marvel geek. However most of my life Wolverine was my favorite because I wished I had his healing powers. I thought about how much more I could do if I was less sickly. Now as an adult, however, I relate way more to Iron Man. I'm not a rich playboy but I love that he has panic attacks even though he's a superhero whi shouldn't logically be afraid. That makes me feel better about when I'm freaking out about something others view as a non issue. Also he has horrible O.C.D. He can't be handed things unless its Pepper or Happy handing them to him. That's such a strange thing to be O.C.D about however so are most of my O.C.D triggers. I cannot handle a set of blinds being slightly skewed or one of them messed up. It drives me nuts and I must stop what I'm doing and fix the blinds. I feel like my problems can be so debilitating. Then I watch Iron Man and see all the amazing things Tony Stark accomplishes to spite his issues and it makes me happier to be me! Rant over carry on!

Happy Birthday Gramps

Today would have been my Gramp's birthday. We would have thrown him a birthday party. Luke and I would have invited him to the family picnic on Saturday. I think that is the hardest part about when someone you love passes and you have to go through all of their special days without them. I mean who wouldn't want to celebrate him. He was the most amazing man. He was the best Grandpa. He was my main father figure growing up and he rocked it. I still like when I shock my husband because I know how to do some random thing that my Gramps taught me when I was a tomboy. I was thinking this morning that I wish I had something that I did every year on his birthday to remember him. Then I thought about what I did today and I thought he'd be pretty okay with that. See, he loved taking care of the house and getting ready for family gatherings. He loved gardening together. and if he would have lived to meet her he would have loved KayCee and loved that I'm getting ready to have her on the farm. He would have loved the farm and seeing his little Punkin trying to remember how to be okay with having to get dirty. I try to think about what advice he would have when I'm having a rough day. Usually that reminds me to put things into perspective and do what I've got to do. The thing grandpa was best at was being a Grandpa and teaching us all the best lessons. He taught us that the best way to get what we want is to work hard for it. He taught us that if you work hard all day it can be very rewarding to fall asleep in the chair watching T.V. but the most important lesson that he taught us was caring about others and helping anyone if you have the power to do so. I always worry that as the years go by I might forget what his voice sounded like or forget how wonderful his bear hugs were. But I don't think I could ever forget anything about my hero. I miss you Gramps. Happy Birthday!

Allergies, can't leave home without them

Anytime I talk to people about my allergies they always say how much it must suck to not be able to eat chocolate or nuts or to not be able to pick all the beautiful flowers we have on the farm. Yes, all those things do suck but honestly I don't really mind too much that I can't eat chocolate or nuts or whole grain. I don't even mind so much having to avoid the beautiful flowers. What I really hate about my allergies is that I can't snuggle my cats or any long haired dogs without hives. I hate that I can never leave the house without my inhaler, benadryl, or my epi pen. I can't just try new things anymore. I have to be fully prepared at all times to fix any allergic reaction that might occur. I was lucky as a kid I was only allergic to dairy and chocolate. That didn't really have a huge affect on my life. My brothers got a chocolate candy bar I'd get nerds. That was about the extent of it. I could still run around outside and play. I could still ride bikes and make mud-pies and play with snakes. I never thought about my allergies. I miss that but I'm also thankful that I had that. Some kids are born with really bad allergies. Some kids never get to do that stuff. I'm 31 now and I don't need to be playing in the grass. What I do need is to be able to keep my pets around me without taking medications. I need to be able to just run out of the house with my wallet and keys and not a huge diaper bag like purse. I need to not be known as the girl that gets sick so easily or the girl with the bad  lungs or the girl who is allergic to life. I need to be able to be me and have fun. So allergies if you could kindly vacate the premises I would appreciate it!